*Friends make the world go round*

So i have been taking the time to catch up with my mates one on one latley seeing as how i had been so busy and had lost contact with so many people over the last year.

I have caught up with Celeste and as much as i hate to admit it i think all bridges have been burnt. I still love her to bits and want her to have the best life but i feel when ever we makes plans it never works out and then more time passes and we drif further and further apart.

I caught up with Bella and Jason. And just as i expected it wasnt a good catch up. Im not sure whats happening with Bella. She was the one friend i could truly say we can spend a year apart and then fall back into "US" and everything was the same. It use to always be like this.
Now it seems to much has happened ????

Im not sure what it is but for some reason she always seems to compelete with me, no sorry thats not the right wording. She just competes in general and i feel like i am being judged or that i am not good enought to fit into her life anymore? i dont know it just feels so different now? I hate it. I want to change it but i dont know how?

Maybe its me? maybe i want more out  of the friendship? Who knows its just awkward and i NEVER thought i would say that.

I also caught up with Kylie, which was awesome. I think we will always be mates. Granted we dont see or talk every week but we have known eachother out whole lives and been through so much.
And right now she is pregnant and there is a little baby in there that i get to spoil and just like i taught "Its" mother, I can teach the child how to ride a bike also :)

I Caught up with Princess D who has a lot goin on right now. I really love princess D but there is so much i cant share or talk about with her. Sometimes i dont understand it but other times i do. Its hard to always watch what you say or how you act or what you do and 9 times out of 10 i just dont quiet fit in.

I caught up with Donnamah. Gosh i love that girl. She is just awesome. Nothing is fake and its always straight forward and honest. and i really admire that in her. I love that she doesnt act likes a tool or contridict herself all the time.

Been seeing a lot of Sammy latley omg i love Sam so much she is just so gawgus and kind and i love her to bits. I think the reason we get a long so well is because i can see alot of things i do in her.
Like caring for mates and always going above for people and the way she is with her mates is like how i am with mine. Mind you i have backed off this year and its been really interesting.
I have had a few attemps to see my mates but for once not be me who is running around, or the driver or the payer and its been really interesting to see.

I have to take my hat off and be so greatful that i have wonderful people in my life. Latly i have been so looked after. i have been goign through a rough time and Jane has been so amazing that girl suprises me all the time.
She hasnt let me hide away alone or skip events because she knows where i am at.

Im a bit upset with other people because they keep cancelling plans. Even if its small things like waiting for them to come over and then just not showing up. Yeah cos i have nothing better to do that hang around all day waiting.

I guess this sounds really negative but the truth is it isnt. iam acturally really happy at the moment. And i am so over taking the scrap or the blackmail or the guilt for things that are not in my control or are not my fault.

Im happy im working my butt off at the gym so im fitter for euro touro and thats all im focusing on at the moment :O)

That is all
xoxo
Love me.